Monday, 25th January, 2016
The Unforgivable Mistake
Alone, in incredible pain and unable to walk, I spent the following weeks in bed incessantly crying and wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I refused to accept the diagnosis of Muscle Disease and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome because I knew it was wrong.
How could a healthy individual become ‘handicapped’ within the space of three months? It just didn’t make sense and nobody was giving me any clear answers. Obsessed with finding an answer for myself, I turned to Dr. Google, to whom I could divulge my crazy symptoms and not be laughed back with sneer. After hours and hours of ‘surfing’ the internet, only one condition kept reappearing – Lyme Disease.
“Nah, there is no Lyme Disease in the UK, it’s all in America,” says my brother dismissively when I share my suspicions with him. “It’s just stress and you will be fine in a couple of weeks,” he tells me reassuringly.
Desperate for some medical attention, I next turn to a family member who happens to be an Internist in the Lyme infested state of Virginia, USA, for some help. Once again, I am belittled, my symptoms are ridiculed and I am told that “it’s all in my head!” I am hurt, disappointed and hugely upset, as this was the one person that could have helped me. Being familiar with the symptoms of early disseminated Lyme, this ‘family member’ could have saved me and lived up to his Hippocratic Oath.
This was going to be my fourth mistake. I should have listened to Dr. Google after all. I should accepted the diagnosis of Lyme Disease so accurately made by Dr. Google. I should have listened to my gut instinct, which perhaps could have still rescued me from the horrors that I was going to endure months later.